I broke my leg; it didn’t break me. Part Two: Making a miracle.
Let’s recap.
As a refresher for those who read the first article I wrote, I’m going to provide an enormously abridged version of it in this section. The original article can be found here.
I highly recommend you read that article first, so that you can get the most of this one. And no, I’m not just saying that. You wouldn’t read chapter 4 of a book before chapter 1, would you? Okay, glad we’re on the same page, moving on…
Enormously Abridged Summary:
September 2017, my lung collapsed, I had surgery in October 2017, which resulted in “permanent nerve damage” which was being treated up until March 26th, 2018, which, coincidentally, was the day that I broke my leg and tore my meniscus in a freak rock-climbing accident. I had a lot of reasons to be sad/mad/xyz you-name-it-negative-emotion. But I decided not to feel that way, and used different methods and strategies to make this experience as painless as possible.
So Why do a Part 2?
In I broke my leg; it didn’t break me. Your personal guide to taking an injury and making the most of it, I left you guys with the idea that no matter what happens, it’s completely up to you how you react. Remember that? Still true. But, Part 1 was all about the initial stages, meant to prepare you for the ups and downs that inevitably come from an injury, by building your mental and emotional fortitude. Now that we built that up, the real healing can happen.
Healing
9 days after breaking my leg, something big happened.
I thumped my way in to physical therapy at 8:30 am on my crutches. I was tired, my arms ached, and I had just driven from my surgeon’s office–in Austin rush hour traffic, mind you–to pick up an order for a temporary handicapped sticker that I would have to get at the DMV (my own personal hell) that day. But, I told myself that today was going to be a great day, so I signed in to my appointment with a smile on my face and tried to muster up enough enthusiasm for my exercises as possible. I thumped behind the PT assistant as he walked me to my first task. I took off my brace, put down the crutches, took a deep breath, and got on what I considered to be the most painful machine in that entire building. I closed my eyes and braced myself...
I started pedaling on the exercise bike, and there was no pain. I was shocked, this was the same bike with the same pedals that I couldn’t even make do one rotation just a week earlier. This was huge. Then I moved on to my next exercise, and there was no pain. And the next one, no pain. My physical therapist came over and told me how it looked like my swelling was gone. I realize I haven’t seen my leg without the brace in a while. I look down. Both legs look about the same. I guess she’s right. She leaves me to my exercises and calls my surgeon. I do one exercise after another, and there’s still no pain. Please don’t let this be a dream. She comes back and says it’s incredible, but I can go down to one crutch. If it doesn’t hurt by when I come in Friday, we’ll talk about next steps. At this point, I’m simultaneously confused and about to burst with excitement. Did my new approach actually work?
I leave the office with one crutch, huge grin, and unparalleled gratitude for this sudden change in events. I go through that day and the next in a state of sheer awe. I have one free hand! Look at me, carrying my own coffee mug to my desk! It only takes me a minute to get to my car! Heck yeah, life is wonderful! I’m so lucky to be alive! Friday can’t come fast enough!
On Friday, 11 days after breaking my leg, I am walking without crutches or pain.
My new approach worked. Don’t believe it? Ask my surgeon, doctor, or physical therapist–all of whom initially told me I would have at least 6-8 weeks of staying off that leg, using crutches, and may even want to look into getting a wheelchair.
No, I’m not a doctor.
Not even close. I don’t have a medical degree, the closest I ever came to performing a medical procedure was picking cactus needles out of my skin one time in the desert. What could I possibly know about healing, right?
But, I’ve been a patient. I’ve been a patient many times. I’ve been a good patient, I’ve been a bad patient, I’ve been and impatient patient. If you’re thinking that I must be some sort of genetic mutant with traits that allow me to heal fast, unfortunately I’m going to have to burst your bubble. I’ve healed painfully slower than average, I’ve healed normally, I’ve healed quickly, and now I’ve healed miraculously. To put this in perspective, the last time I hurt this leg, I tore my ACL and had to have surgery. It took almost 4 months for me to completely recover, compared to the 6-8 weeks that my doctor had estimated.
So what was the difference, what did I do?
Well, I started with the steps in the previous article. Haven’t read it yet? Seriously, read it!
Then, I put my new-found time lying in bed to good use.
It started simple, the idea was that there had to be a reason why sometimes I healed faster than other times. Then, I went searching for a correlation, figuring that the best place to start was with my past injuries and hospitalizations, given the large data set I had to work with. This started by making a list of the past injuries I’ve had, then writing every detail I could remember about them. I’m talking everything; how long it took to recover, what the doctor said the recovery time would be, if I believed that I would recover in that time, what medicines they had me take, if there was surgery or not, if there were complications, my mood when I woke up, who was around me, how they were behaving, how well I listened to the doctor’s instructions, if I saw friends– you name it I wrote it down, for all of them.
If you’re thinking, “That sounds overwhelming, I mean who has time in the day to do that? I am so busy, I can’t even make food for myself at night, and now I’m injured and you want me to spend time dwelling on the past?! Are you nuts?” Honestly, I probably would have thought that too at one point.
But here’s something to think about: If I hadn’t spent the time doing this, I wouldn’t have been able to start seeing what was going wrong. If I didn’t know why it was happening, then I wouldn’t have been able to address it. If I hadn’t addressed it, then I would still be on crutches, taking much longer to get to places and do everyday things. So, the time that I spent doing, and learning from, this exercise ended up ultimately alleviating me from weeks of pain, giving me back days of productivity, and saving me money on all of the extra medical expenses I would have incurred. Given my results, I would confidently say this exercise was a good investment of my time, and I’d bet that it would be a good one for you too.
Plus! I’m going to make it easier for you, download a free printable to guide this exercise at the end of this article. So no excuses!
Maybe you’ve only been hurt once, or maybe you always heal fast but never as fast as I did, or maybe you are reading this and not actually injured, etc. For those of you that are thinking, “What could I learn from you? Our experiences are different.” I’ll be the first to concede that it’s extremely unlikely that we’ve been through the same thing, and my results are just that, mine. But, I’m asking you to stay with me here. There’s a lesson that I believe can be learned, even if you’re not injured at all.
Initial Findings
I usually didn’t trust the doctor’s estimate of time.
I mostly followed the doctor’s orders, unless it was too uncomfortable, or expensive, or inconvenient with my schedule.
Sometimes, I was with family, who loved me, but also worried about me, were cautious around me, and warned me not to do things that they perceived to be potentially dangerous.
I ate what I thought was healthy, as opposed to what my body was craving.
My mood was variable, and though having a good mood didn’t necessarily correlate to healing faster, having a bad mood definitely correlated to healing slower.
Digging deeper: learning about yourself, and confronting your beliefs.
Usually, at this point you’re probably thinking okay, so just do things different? That’s it? Well yes, and no.
It’s not enough to just go through the actions. Think of this like trying to get rid of weeds in your backyard. You can cut them down, but if you don’t get rid of the roots, then they keep growing back. Your patterns or “bad luck” are like the weeds, and your beliefs, thoughts, or reasons for approaching an injury the way you do are the roots. It’s time to pull them out, dig deep if we have to, and fix what’s holding you back.
I approached this by listing my findings from the previous exercise. Then for each of the things found:
Ask why (or what belief could have caused this)
Ask where did this belief come from?
Consciously changing the belief by writing down a new belief to replace it.
To see all of my findings and beliefs broken down, as well as a blank template for your own use, download the free printable at the end of this article!
The making of a miracle.
There’s a chance that many of you won’t be open to accepting the answers I have to give, that you’ll find it hard to believe what I’m saying, or tell me I’m not god and I can’t possibly make a miracle happen. That’s a chance I’m willing to take. I’m aware that my ideas won’t resonate with everyone (I mean, what a tall order, what idea ever has?), but that’s okay. In this section, I’m writing to the people who need to hear this. One person finding relief is worth more to me than 100 people disagreeing with me is.
Controversy and affirmations.
Now, I’ve been dabbling in the self-help world for a while. I regularly go to therapy, listen to motivational speakers, read self-help books, and write down my goals. But, the idea of affirmations had always been one I didn’t quite buy, even though everything I took in talked about them and how great they were. But every time I saw someone mention them, I found myself thinking something along the lines of this:
Seriously? I’m more rational than that, I’m a scientist for heaven’s sake. You’re really going to tell me that by repeating phrases to myself–out loud–that I’m going to magically bring the things I want to me? What if my roommate is at home, I mean she’s caught me talking to my cat more than once, and probably already thinks I’m crazy, if I did that too, she’d really think I’ve gone insane. Let’s skip past this part and get to something more practical.
Sound familiar? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t. Point is, that I’ll be the first to admit it sounds totally unbelievable that affirmations could work.
A turning point for me came recently. Right after I got injured, a book I ordered a while back was delivered. The book was called “You Can Heal Your Life” by Louise Hay. She literally cured herself of cancer. CANCER.
As I read, she too talked about the power of affirmations, and all these things that I had been so eager to throw in the pile of wacky-doesn’t-make-sense-crap before. It took until reading about affirmations in that book, for me to finally ask myself the question: could this really work? I searched the web for scientific papers that discussed this. I actually found quite a bit more than I intended, and mostly, the verdict was yes. Okay... so the scientist inside me could wrap my head around it… I busted out laughing, (really glad my roommate wasn’t around for that, she would have totally thought I was crazy), threw up my hands, and told god, or the universe however you want to explain it, “Okay, you’ve won, I’ll play.”
After doing the exercise of writing down and changing my beliefs, I turned my new-found beliefs into daily affirmations. In eleven days, I was back on my feet.
Isn’t it funny how sometimes you’re surrounded by the answer, but you’re fighting it?
When we are kids, we believe in miracles. At some point, most of us grow up and lose our connection to that belief. Don’t be like me and wait until you’ve literally had to break your leg to start believing that miracles can happen. I’ve found the easiest logic to explain them, is that we as humans do not currently know all there is to know. Think about it: even top scientists at NASA get stumped with things in the universe that they can’t explain. There were so many things once considered impossible, until someone did it: building a machine that allowed humans to be in the sky, going deep in the ocean, eating 73.5 hot dogs AND buns in 10 minutes are all examples of this.
So, if you want something miraculous to happen, I’m going to strongly suggest you do these:
Read the previous article and actually do the things it asks you to. We need to build our mindset.
Spend time examining your past injuries or situations.
Figure out what beliefs caused you to act, or behave the way you did in that situation.
Substitute your old beliefs with new beliefs, and write the new ones down.
Use these new beliefs to guide how you approach your situations from now on.
Say them out loud as affirmations. Put saying them on your to-do list each day. Do it in the car. Just do it.
Get a copy of Louise Hay’s Book, and read it.
Keep your faith in miracles strong.
I’m going to leave you guys with one of my favorite quotes:
“Trade in your drama about how you can’t have what you want for the grateful expectation that miracles will walk into your life, and the more commonplace those miracles will become.”
–Jen Sincero, You are a Badass (another book that I strongly recommend reading)
Sincerely,
Taylor
